The Meaning of Life
It had been a very relaxing, enjoyable week of vacation. Crashing at Jennifer and Darren's place was alternated with visiting friends in New Jersey, Pennsylvania, and New York City. As the airplane touched down in Nashville, I breathed a sigh of relief glad to back on terra firma following several hours contemplating the absurd insanity of being in a tin can thousands of feet above the planet's surface. It also felt good to back in Tennessee again.
In a moment of minor anxiety, I realized I couldn't remember what section of the parking lot my car was in. I remembered it ended with a "9", but couldn't remember what letter preceded the "9". Fortunately, I discovered that all of the sections started with an "S", meaning that I had to be in "S9". We could discuss the lack of rational efficiency behind the redundant use of "S" before all of the numerals when assigning appelations to parking lot sections. However, that has nothing to do with the meaning of life. Just let it be known that if I'm ever elected president in chief of the Nashville airport, I promise to remove the "S" from all of the numbers.
Relief at finding my car where I had left it and remembering where I had left it was short lived. A quick search revealed that my car keys were not in my pockets. That was not all that worrisome given that I hadn't needed them for the past week, and they were probably therefore in my luggage somewhere.
A quick search through my luggage demonstrated no car keys. A very thorough search resulting in luggage contents being spread across the pavement also demonstrated no car keys. Another very meticulous search through every pocket, every nook and cranny of every bag also demonstrated no car keys. This was definitely not good.
Making matters worse, it was 11:00 PM, the temperature felt like I was on the tundra, and my cell phone was not working. I repacked my scattered possessions, and thought about my options. The ticket booth where you pay your fee for parking was a five minute walk away, so I decided to see if they had a phone. However, I had no desire to make the trek with all of my luggage in tow. Leaving it all there by my car seemed like an option likely to generate interest by the local bomb squad. Fortunately the dilemma was solved by stuffing it all underneath my car. Fortunately the area was deserted and no one reported my strange behaviour to the local authorities.
Honda Care, the Honda roadside assistance plan, was very helpful. They promised to have a locksmith there in 30 minutes. All I needed to do was sit by my car and wait for them to show up. I therefore sat by my car and waited and waited and waited. This is the point at which I started contemplating the meaning of life. I was becoming more and more convinced that it had a lot more to do with warmth than I had previously reckoned.
An hour after my first call, another trek to the guard station and a call to the Honda Care people revealed that the locksmith had not been able to find me. They would send one again. All I had to do was sit by car and wait for him to show up in 20-30 minutes. They knew exactly where I was. After 45 more minutes spent pondering the meaning of life, I decided that the ultimate meaning in life derived from the possession of car keys of which I was unfortunately bereft.
I caught the night's last bus out of the parking lot, found a hotel room, and had a more successful meeting with the locksmith in the morning. I once again have car keys, and my life is therefore full of meaning. I wish every one of you a life with car keys in possession.
In a moment of minor anxiety, I realized I couldn't remember what section of the parking lot my car was in. I remembered it ended with a "9", but couldn't remember what letter preceded the "9". Fortunately, I discovered that all of the sections started with an "S", meaning that I had to be in "S9". We could discuss the lack of rational efficiency behind the redundant use of "S" before all of the numerals when assigning appelations to parking lot sections. However, that has nothing to do with the meaning of life. Just let it be known that if I'm ever elected president in chief of the Nashville airport, I promise to remove the "S" from all of the numbers.
Relief at finding my car where I had left it and remembering where I had left it was short lived. A quick search revealed that my car keys were not in my pockets. That was not all that worrisome given that I hadn't needed them for the past week, and they were probably therefore in my luggage somewhere.
A quick search through my luggage demonstrated no car keys. A very thorough search resulting in luggage contents being spread across the pavement also demonstrated no car keys. Another very meticulous search through every pocket, every nook and cranny of every bag also demonstrated no car keys. This was definitely not good.
Making matters worse, it was 11:00 PM, the temperature felt like I was on the tundra, and my cell phone was not working. I repacked my scattered possessions, and thought about my options. The ticket booth where you pay your fee for parking was a five minute walk away, so I decided to see if they had a phone. However, I had no desire to make the trek with all of my luggage in tow. Leaving it all there by my car seemed like an option likely to generate interest by the local bomb squad. Fortunately the dilemma was solved by stuffing it all underneath my car. Fortunately the area was deserted and no one reported my strange behaviour to the local authorities.
Honda Care, the Honda roadside assistance plan, was very helpful. They promised to have a locksmith there in 30 minutes. All I needed to do was sit by my car and wait for them to show up. I therefore sat by my car and waited and waited and waited. This is the point at which I started contemplating the meaning of life. I was becoming more and more convinced that it had a lot more to do with warmth than I had previously reckoned.
An hour after my first call, another trek to the guard station and a call to the Honda Care people revealed that the locksmith had not been able to find me. They would send one again. All I had to do was sit by car and wait for him to show up in 20-30 minutes. They knew exactly where I was. After 45 more minutes spent pondering the meaning of life, I decided that the ultimate meaning in life derived from the possession of car keys of which I was unfortunately bereft.
I caught the night's last bus out of the parking lot, found a hotel room, and had a more successful meeting with the locksmith in the morning. I once again have car keys, and my life is therefore full of meaning. I wish every one of you a life with car keys in possession.
posted by The Mad Hatter at 9:28 AM
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